Femininity is for all women – single ladies, wifeys, and mommies. Chrissie has covered a lot of the essentials for women, but I wanted to dive deeper and cover some essentials for mothers. This list is hardly comprehensive, but it’s the most pertinent items that came to mind when I recalled how my transition from single lady to mommy went. It can be a lot to balance at times, but remaining feminine, poised, and attractive is possible, even with your little ones in tow.
First, be sure to invest in a great mommy bag. You’ll want this bag to be functional with lots of compartments with which to store bottles, toys, extra diapers for the little one, wipes, and your own items. You’ll want it to be durable, so I recommend dropping the extra money on a designer brand canvas bag. Coach makes a great one, as does Michael Kors.
Your mom bag will have items spilled in it, pen marks inside of it, and at some point, you might even get into a tug-o-war with your toddler over it. You want something that will hold up to the use and can easily be washed by tossing into the machine then hanging dry. I do not recommend loading your bag down with too much as this can make it heavy and hard to carry. Tote bag organizers are useful for keeping items sorted and easy to reach for, and they are sold relatively cheap on Amazon.
Inside your bag, make sure to always stay stocked on baby wipes, lip shade, hair ties, and bobby pins. Don’t clutter up your bag trying to bring along all of your makeup as well as the baby’s things. Too much in your bag can just make it a cluttered mess, and part of being a poised mom is being able to act quickly. With that being said, I recommend keeping an umbrella in the car that can be grabbed on rainy days as well as an essential oil topical rub for some aromatherapy. The umbrella’s use is obvious, but the essential oils might sound new.
A topical roll-on can support you while you’re on the go while doubling as a pleasant fragrance to wear. I’m a fan of diluted peppermint for headaches (applied at the temples), lavender or jasmine for calm (applied at the wrists and behind the ears), and citrus for energy and wellness (same spots). The aromatics provided by these oils give you a pleasant but not overpowering scent as well. Dilute your oils appropriately and use a roll-on applicator. Never use essential oils outside of their intended use.
Next, I think all moms need a collection of cute stud earrings. Get a variety of them so that you can change things up with the different outfits you wear. The earrings don’t need to be expensive, but they should be hypoallergenic and pretty. Cubic Zirconias in the $20-$30 range work well.
You’ll want to avoid dangling styles as these can be pulled on by baby as well as catch in your hair, but a cute pair of studs will make your outfit look well put together, even if just in leggings and a top. Earrings dial up the femininity on your look while also adding some style, so have fun. I recently picked up some marble studs from Amazon and they look like little moons. Go for fun colors that can complement your wardrobe.
I do not always wear the most eye-catching fashion, but I do love beautiful wraps. All moms should keep flyaway cardigans, kimono type wraps, cute scarves for winter, cardigan sweaters, and other layers in their closet. They are an easy way to add color and style to an outfit without having to be uncomfortable. They can be worn over jeans or leggings and a tank top to dress an outfit up easily. They are also comfortable.
Lastly, invest in comfortable shoes. Ballet flats are great, and you might want to have them in multiple colors. I also recommend sandals with embellishments or bows to mix comfort and style, and a decent pair of boots to wear in winter months or when it rains. Again, you do not have to spend a fortune on your shoes, but they should look nice, hold up well, and complement your wardrobe for all occasions.
I have a feeling this series has the power to continue if you want it, but for now, here are some starting points for finding your own style while also remaining prepared as a mother. Your identity does not have to be devoured by your decision to welcome babies. It will change, but you do not have to be defined by your kids only.
Antoinette is a consultant, author, yogini, and host of The Midday Reset Podcast. When she is not advising clients, authoring books, or recording episodes for her podcast, she is enjoying life with her husband and two children. Find her on Instagram @msantoinettechanel.