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What Emotional Balance Looks Like For Black Women

Emotional balance is not a milestone we can reach in the same way as learning how to ride a bike. In fact, it's doubtful there even is such a thing as perfect balance. The goal would be to find a way to keep the scales tipped more or less in our favor. To hang onto those handlebars and stay upright as we careen through this thing called "life'.

She’s in Emotional Homeostasis.

Emotional systems are much like our physical bodies; in that all parts, thoughts, actions, and reactions must work harmoniously before balance occurs. For example; that great promotion you just got at work isn't going to change the fact that you are experiencing problems at home. Whether you realize it or not, your problems will eventually seep into other areas of your life, throwing off your emotional balance and potentially jeopardizing your performance at work.

She Communicates.

Balanced women clearly state what they want, respect the opinions of others, and successfully work out solutions to conflicts.

She’s Optimistic.

She's a 'glass-half-full' kind of woman, without being a sickeningly sweet Pollyanna. She understands that a productive method of channeling stress is an important part of balance. She may not eliminate the source of her sadness or anger; but she realizes that if she can find a way to view her experiences constructively, then even the curveballs that are thrown at her won't hit her too far afield.

She’s Creative.

When our emotions are in equilibrium, we knit, garden, or write short stories - because our creative juices are flowing. We tend to report being most happy when we become totally immersed in an activity. Creativity helps us enjoy time by ourselves. Many of us spend so little time alone that when we finally do get a few precious moments, we become paralyzed and don't even know how to spend it. But when we are emotionally balanced, we can brainstorm interesting ways to spend a half-hour, 3 hours, or even a whole day.

She’s Flexible.

Emotionally balanced women can deal with change calmly and rationally. She will react to what is actually going on versus what she thinks is going on. Instead of creating a scene, she first gathers information before jumping to conclusions.

She’s Satisfied.

Crucial to emotional balance, is a sense of happiness and well-being that comes from within. Emotionally healthy women does not seek external stimuli to make them happy.

She’s Nutritionally Balanced.

When it comes to emotional health, this woman enjoys an occasional indulgence.

She’s Well-Rested.

Sleep is a basic need that keeps us in physical, mental, and emotional balance. A lot of women report that when they are stressed, they cannot fall asleep. Without enough of it, we are more likely to get tense, edgy, and emotionally distressed.

She Recognizes Her Weaknesses.

She knows she's not perfect. She is the total of her parts, both good and bad. So she's learned to balance her quick temper with her equally quick wit.

She Mingles.

Emotionally balanced women thrive on social support. And some of it should be developed outside of romantic relationships. She makes time for lunches or dinners with the girls; or afternoons spent antiquing with her best friend.

She’s Selfish.

She knows that in today's busy world, effective time-management is a practical step in her journey towards emotional balance. She prioritizes the important elements of her life.

She Dates Herself.

Instead of reading about luxurious bubble baths and tossing the magazine aside to go make lunch for the Brownie troop, the emotionally balanced woman actually buys the bath oils, runs the tub, and spins an hour steaming away. She knows that if she does not make time for herself, her physical and emotional being will shut down.

She Moves.

Movement releases chemicals that enhance mood and boost energy. The emotionally balanced woman knows this. She turns on the music and dances, gardens, runs, or just throw rocks at a tree. She will resort to healthy activities to help her physically release emotional tensions.

And She Stops.

The emotionally balanced woman lives for the moment, when society tends to live for tomorrow and yesterday - all at the expense of what is happening now.

Valerie lives in New York. As a health advocate, she shares tips and steps on maximizing nutrition, weight, and fitness goals to help others embrace a healthier lifestyle. She blogs at Halfmile Fitness.

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